Kat's Background

Well, when I got pregnant with Kat, I was 18, and on the pill. Obviously that didn't work very well. The pill is 99% effective, but as the Priest on Desperate Housewives once said, "God is in that 1%".

Kathleen's Biological father was never very keen on the thought of me having her - nor was he willing to be a active parent in her life. It took very many years, and tons of e-mails and phone calls until I got any type of response from his end. And by his end, I mean his Girlfriend.

After almost 2 years of visits with his Girlfriend (and him in the same house SOMETIMES), his parents decided they wanted to be an active part of her life. That began in June of 2009. In July of 2009, they decided to surprise me with a paid trip to Disney Land for Kathleen and them for her Grandmothers Birthday. Being that they had only known each other for a month or so, I found it a little odd that they made this arrangement without consulting me.

They asked me not to tell Kathleen - they thought it would be a nice surprise for her. I on the other hand, knowing my daughter much better - knew that this would not be a good idea. So, I brought it up to Kathleen, and she asked if I were going. No, I wasn't. She said she did not want to go. I left it at that. I was not going to try and talk my child into a two week vacation with the Grandparents she had just met.

On her one and only over night with her Grandparents, she came home to inform me that at bed time, she was not allowed to call and tell me good night, and when she cried for me, she was told only babies cry for their Mommy, and she needed to go to bed. THIS, broke my heart!!! I would do anything to comfort my little cuddle bunny, and knowing these people would not allow her to call me when she needed me, I WAS FURIOUS!!!

Well, over the last 3 years, I have tried my hardest to be supportive and encouraging the visits and encourage the relationship between them. But I feel like I have been lied to, and used. All of these visits began on the basis that JP wanted a relationship with Kat, but didn't want any contact with myself. That's fine, because I didn't want anything to do with him either.

(in November 2009, I met my husband Andrew, and Kathleen calls him Daddy [her choice] and says that he is her Daddy. when asked why, she says "Because he does Daddy things")

But this year things changed - for the worst from what I can tell.

Kat's Grandparents have never visited more than 4-5 times a year, but each visits is from 9am until 10 or 11pm.
In May I got a letter stating JP had a warrant for his arrest for his back child support. I e-mailed Sue Ann right away and let her know I did not feel comfortable with Kat visiting while JP had the warrant out - I did not want him getting arrested while Kat was there to see it. She promptly e-mailed me for a visit in June, and I declined because JP had not taken care of it.

Well, in August, I got served papers from Cuyahoga County Juvenile Courts - apparently JP had filed for custody. "Jeremy Paul Worley vs. Patricia A. Savol" AWESOME!!!
Date filed - May 10, 2012. Seriously people? This was before I even emailed them about JP taking care of the warrant.

Well, call me a bad mom, but, I let Kathleen think for herself. So, if they requested a visit I would ask Kathleen if she wanted to go. If she said no, I would decline, if she said yes, I would say yes.
Here is my issue - no one in their family has EVER called to say "Hi, can I talk to Kathleen?", nor has anyone ever called to say "Hey Kat, how was school today?".

Once in a great while the Grandparents will send a post card, or a card in the mail - which I think is cool!! Kat loves getting things in the mail, and she loved getting the cute cards or post cards. But they aren't involved or show that they want to be involved outside of the couple visits a year.

Well, here is what really set me off - This year, I e-mailed Sue Ann to invite her, Paul and JP to Kats back to school BBQ. They declined and said they had plans they couldn't change. No biggy.

After that, I got an e-mail from her saying that I refused to let Kathleen attend her Birthday Party - the problem was, I never knew anything about it!!

After several e-mails, we finally agreed on a day and time Kathleen could go with them (they were going to Cedar Point, but it was the day Kat started school, so I agreed to let her go Tuesday, but she would have to be home by 8pm).

(let me insert here, that Sue Ann blocked me from her cell phone, so even if Kat did go with her, I had no way of getting a hold of them unless I blocked the number and called from Andrews phone)

Well, on Monday night, at about 9pm (after Kat was already in bed, expecting to be picked up early the next morning), I got an e-mail from Sue Ann saying it was best they didnt pick Kathleen up, under the circumstances.

*(the words that went through my mind I cannot post here because my Blog would ger reported for adult content!)*

The next morning I let Kathleen sleep in, and when she woke up, I told her about the e-mail, and she cried. "What am I going to tell my friends? I told them all I Was going to Cedar Point, they will think I lied" I felt so bad for her. I wished I had a car so I could drive her up myself.

(to be continued...)